You must definitely be wondering, who I am and what do I mean? What on earth am I about and why does it sound like I’m gloating. Well, the truth is I’m a cheat, no let’s make it a serial cheat. Do I enjoy cheating? Absolutely. Does that mean my relationship? No, let’s make it, relationships do not last and is full of emotional pain for my significant others.
On the contrary, the average time span of my relationships is 27 months. Oh Lord, the jury is definitely out for me now. But hold on let me state my case then you can judge me and crucify me if you wish. What is cheating?
Cheating is difficult to define as it is subjective. Cheating can only be clearly defined by the person who is emotionally hurt. But we can say cheating occurs when a person betrays his/her significant other’s appropriate expectations about how the cheat interacts with others.
There are several forms of cheating such as; Physical Cheating, Emotional Cheating, Cyber Cheating and my personal favorite Chexting. I’m sure we are all familiar with these kinds of cheating.
Ah, what does Chexting mean you asked? Chexting is just a coined term for text message cheating. Pretty clever right? Yeah, it is clever but that does not make it any less hurtful.
Now to my story.
I was born into a family made up predominantly of women. I was loved, catered for and taught by women. This, in turn, made me love women at a very tender age. This reciprocity of love was the genesis of my cheating.
The love for women stuck with me through my upbringing and even before I hit puberty, I was a proper gentleman. Call me chivalrous if you want, but the truth is I have a weakness for women in general.
My first proper relationship was with Yvonne after completing high school. I was 17 and she was 18, we had met at a high school party. She had been dancing wildly and got the wind rightly knocked out of her and she was looking to sit down so I gave up my seat so that she wouldn’t fall and get laughed at.
That was how we met and after a few (planned by me) chance meetings, we started dating. I treated her with the utmost respect and would always make sure she was comfortable. Her friends watched how I treated her and wondered why their boyfriends couldn’t do the same for them. This led to a discussion amongst them which she later told me off.
Before long we were going on dates with her friends tagging along and laughing hard at my quips and jokes. Then it began. The sideways looks and smiles, the winks and glitter in their eyes, their inappropriate touches. I told Yvonne about it and she said there was nothing to it.
So I played along and before long the inevitable happened. Yes!!! I cheated. One of her friends (Tracy) had decided that she would not miss out on the attention I had no problem sharing with Yvonne. Yvonne eventually found and was hurt but she realized she could be faulted as well, so we patched things up and remain friends to this day.
But that began a cycle that has remained to this day. Cheating on my significant other with her friends has become a thing. I come across as a very caring and open person so most often they open up to me easily with their issues for advice and that leads to emotional cheating.
Now I make it a point to tell my significant others ahead of time about the possibility of this occurrence and most of them laugh it off but when they begin to notice the subtle changes in their friends they realize the truth.
My preferred method of cheating is chexting because it’s so easy and you don’t need to be in a physical space to do it. I remember one time when I posted a job online, I was inundated with several messages from women ready to exchange sexual favors in return for securing the job.
Occasionally, physical cheating occurs but that is not something I want. As luck would have it, I have much more female friends than male friends. And that is an early warning sign for my significant other.
My significant others knowing my affinity for the opposite sex has actually made my relationships stronger and healthier. They know from the onset what they are getting into and then draw up the rules of engagement and then all is well. Most of my girlfriends, past and present agree that chexting is cool so long as it does not lead to something physical.
I know other ladies will think otherwise but hey, these are real issues that confront men on a daily basis. Most men do not cheat because they want to or because they do not love their significant others, but rather because of the opportunity that arises from a perceived lack of meeting an emotional or physical need.